THINGS ABOUT CHILDREN TO THINK ABOUT !
1. You spend the first two years of their life
teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend
the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward
for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why
some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you.
In fact, they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own.
6. We childproofed our homes,
but they a re still getting in.
29.4.08
A few Things to look at!
Sign this petition.
http://www.righttolearn.ca/#
_____________________
I wrote this to the Learning Disabilities Association of Canada:
Hey there!
My name is Linda Brown and I attend the Brother T.I Murphy Centre in St. John's, Newfoundland. It is an alternative learning facility for people who want a high school diploma. It offers regular high school courses (academic & general), and Adult Basic Education (academic & general). I am a participant at the Murphy Centre and I have been involved in Action Research with a team of facilitators, participants, and our principle researcher Dr. Morgan Gardner from Memorial University. Recently I have been working on various projects relating to youth advocacy in education, and youth as change makers. Our team has been investigating changes in our facility, and I myself have been involved in a rigorous interview process by which I have individually spoke to several members of the staff in hopes of bringing some new light and ideas to our findings. Throughout my research, it came to my attention that the Murphy Centre is facing a big challenge in regards intake periods. There is a growing number of people that the Murphy Centre has to turn down each intake period because the people coming to them have severe learning or cognitive difficulties. Stories I have heard from staff members include people being in their mid-twenties who are too old to be accepted into a high school, who are being turned away because the Murphy Centre does not have the correct modified program to offer to those who need it. From what I've heard (and experienced in my high school years) in most high schools there is a (I'm not sure if this is still the correct term) Pathway 3 or Pathway 4 learning centre where people with special needs can get the support they need. The Murphy Centre is facing a rising number of people who would benefit greatly from a program like the ones in high schools, except it's in need for adults! Now, I know this sounds absurd and I cannot possibly understand how it can be, but when these people are turned down by the Murphy Centre they then ask, "Well where do I go next?", and the people at the Murphy Centre have to tell them that this is the end of the line- there isn't anywhere else here you can go. Is this really true?! If it is, we need help! The student drop out rate is at an ultimate high in Newfoundland, 500-600 students a year. The Murphy Centre can only accommodate between 80-100 a year! And even if the facility had the space of proper funding to grow, only a percentage of the students would actually benefit from it because, even though we are an alternative facility, we do not have an alternative curriculum!
Help is needed in Newfoundland!
Sincerely,
Linda Brown
___________________________________
http://www.righttolearn.ca/#
_____________________
I wrote this to the Learning Disabilities Association of Canada:
Hey there!
My name is Linda Brown and I attend the Brother T.I Murphy Centre in St. John's, Newfoundland. It is an alternative learning facility for people who want a high school diploma. It offers regular high school courses (academic & general), and Adult Basic Education (academic & general). I am a participant at the Murphy Centre and I have been involved in Action Research with a team of facilitators, participants, and our principle researcher Dr. Morgan Gardner from Memorial University. Recently I have been working on various projects relating to youth advocacy in education, and youth as change makers. Our team has been investigating changes in our facility, and I myself have been involved in a rigorous interview process by which I have individually spoke to several members of the staff in hopes of bringing some new light and ideas to our findings. Throughout my research, it came to my attention that the Murphy Centre is facing a big challenge in regards intake periods. There is a growing number of people that the Murphy Centre has to turn down each intake period because the people coming to them have severe learning or cognitive difficulties. Stories I have heard from staff members include people being in their mid-twenties who are too old to be accepted into a high school, who are being turned away because the Murphy Centre does not have the correct modified program to offer to those who need it. From what I've heard (and experienced in my high school years) in most high schools there is a (I'm not sure if this is still the correct term) Pathway 3 or Pathway 4 learning centre where people with special needs can get the support they need. The Murphy Centre is facing a rising number of people who would benefit greatly from a program like the ones in high schools, except it's in need for adults! Now, I know this sounds absurd and I cannot possibly understand how it can be, but when these people are turned down by the Murphy Centre they then ask, "Well where do I go next?", and the people at the Murphy Centre have to tell them that this is the end of the line- there isn't anywhere else here you can go. Is this really true?! If it is, we need help! The student drop out rate is at an ultimate high in Newfoundland, 500-600 students a year. The Murphy Centre can only accommodate between 80-100 a year! And even if the facility had the space of proper funding to grow, only a percentage of the students would actually benefit from it because, even though we are an alternative facility, we do not have an alternative curriculum!
Help is needed in Newfoundland!
Sincerely,
Linda Brown
___________________________________
Monday, April 21st.
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
(2 hours)
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
(4.7 hours)
Thursday, April 24th
12:30pm-1:00pm Interviewed Lloyd
1:30pm-3:00pm Interviewed Ron
(2 hours)
Sunday April 27th
1:00pm-2:30pm Typed up Ron's report
(1.5 hours)
Tuesday, April 19th
12:10pm- 2:20pm- Alternative Curriculum Research
(2 hours 10 minutes)
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
(2 hours)
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
(4.7 hours)
Thursday, April 24th
12:30pm-1:00pm Interviewed Lloyd
1:30pm-3:00pm Interviewed Ron
(2 hours)
Sunday April 27th
1:00pm-2:30pm Typed up Ron's report
(1.5 hours)
Tuesday, April 19th
12:10pm- 2:20pm- Alternative Curriculum Research
(2 hours 10 minutes)
Left Brain Right Brain
How can someone, me, who is exceptionally analytical be in touch with their creativity? How can someone like me who is innate to logic and reason learn to simply just love? It's like a huge contradiction....
Facilitator Interview # 4- Part two- RON
An email between Ron and I after he went through the list of ideas that was compiled on to our wheel.
On Sun, 27 Apr 2008 13:03:58 -0230, Linda Brown wrote...
1. How do you feel you can facilitate these changes?
2. What changes would you like to see? (Changes, improvements, enhancements, etc)
3. What would you like to see if ANYTHING was possible?
4.Do you disagree with anything (policies, rules, ways of doing things) at the Murphy Center?
5. Is voice- your personal voice, student voice, etc- important to you?
6. How do you feel about participants having a voice?
7. In what ways do you feel you assist youth in sharing their voice? In what ways would you like to help youth have more voice?
8. What obstacles do you see in regards to our discussion, and what solutions are there for those obstacles?
Okay Linda, I wll go down the list of questions you have a answer them as best I can!
1. I love the suggestions and I will support as always where ever and whenever I can.
2. Change I would like to see are as follows:
- Exercise opportunites for young people and staff at least twice a week.
- More open forum sessions to connect to Center philosophy
- More attention to drug problems as in prevention of drugs on property and assistance with addictions
- More opportunities for outdoor adventure experiences
- Greater accountability and follow through regarding absenteeism
3. A group of students travel the world in a large sailing ship whereby they go to school part of the day and the rest of the time they work and explore the whole world....drug free and high on life! and me on board obviously!!!
4 Yes, I agree with plenty of things because we are obviously doing some things well such as creating a relaxed atmosphere, mutual respect philosophy, commitment to helping young people reach their goals, providing a safe environment and atmosphere for learning etc.
5. Yes, hence my comment about the open forum...best opportunity for that to come out...it was a big part of this place when I first came here and I loved it...for some reason we moved away from it.
6. I love it...it always works for me even if I don't personally agree with some aspet of it...that's democracy in it's truest form!
7. By being an open presence and helping to create a space where that is encouraged to blossom!
8. Basically the same old ones...time, money. I do think these can be overcome with creative energies working together...
and ....thank you for doing this...it was such a pleasure sitting a chatting with you...all the best Linda!Organizing my thoughts
I'm still in the process of writing up the report on my interview with Lloyd. He brought a lot of great things to the table. In the meantime I am having some personal issues that I feel the need to talk about. I'm fighting some hardcore inner demons right now and it could just be this crap weather getting me down but for now I'll just have to deal with it until another sunny day.
I don't know what I want to do with school. I don't know if I want to go to MUN or if it's just all these positive affirmations pushing me along until finally I need to want it for myself. There is so much pressure on me. I know everyone wants me to go to MUN, but do I want to go? I'm not saying I don't, I'm just saying I don't know if I want to do it for myself. I'm hoping this summer I can do some solo traveling to try to figure out exactly what it is that I want for me. I would like to go to a different school- somewhere outside of the province so I could experience a new place as well as do some schooling. I would like a school that's a bit smaller too. From my experience I work more successfully in smaller facilities, however, I've changed a lot since I was in a big facility (at the time, high school was big), so maybe I would do good in a big place. I know I have the brains to do whatever it is that i want to do- but WHAT I want to do is the question. I chose biology because I am doing really good at it.. Getting good grades makes me feel good. BUt do I want to do biology? What is my heart telling me? I want to teach! I know that! I want to change things! I know that! ...
I posted this on my facebook about a week ago.
"MUN or CONA....
MUN or CONA....
???????????????
Mun has lots of great things.... Cona is more affordable....
Mun has a gym with a pool..... Cona has programs that will offer me quick reward.
Mun will be a lot more work.... But in the end it will be more satisfactory...
But Cona would allow me time to travel and see the world....
But Mun has a great reputation...
Cona will allow me to get a well-paying job within the next 3-4 years..
Mun will take longer.... But there's such a diverse culture at Mun....
What do I cherish more?
Making a difference in the world... Or developing myself spiritually and artistically.
Spending my time helping others... Or devoting my time to myself and my family.
Working hard for a long time for a big goal....
Working hard every day for instant gratification...
I DON'T KNOW AHHHHH.
I don't want to be in debt, I'm already living on my own and paying bills and all that... Just to add a STUDENT LOAN on top of that!? If I go to Cona it's feasible that I could save up the money this summer.... Cona is smaller, and I work better in smaller, more hands-on environments... I could always go to Cona and do a course that allows me to transfer my credits if I desire so...
I'm so torn. I don't know what to do..
Then there's the whole other idea of perhaps applying somewhere OUTSIDE of the city... Being able to go to school while I travel and see a new place.. That sounds too ideal.. I
Any advice is welcomed....
*sigh*
-Overwhelmed Linda"
I got some really nice replies:
"Linda - I sympathize with your dilemma. But it's wonderful that you're keeping school as a priority in your life. I'm very proud of you.
The big question is what are you interested in? What courses do you want to study? What is your passion? It's ok if you don't know yet, but you may have a general idea.
One thing is for sure, you'll do better and spend more time on your studies if it is something that you enjoy and something that challenges you. Don't go for something because you think it might be easier than something else you're really interested in. I should know because that's the mistake I made.
Also, if you put the practical questions out of your mind - like money, length of time to get a degree, etc - what does your heart tell you?
I hope this helps a bit.
Love, Aunt Robin"
and
"Dear Linda,
Just read your thoughts re your future. For most, at your age, this is quite the dilemma. Many cannot pursue what they'd really like to do for many reasons - financial mainly.
You've expressed a interest in biology in the past. You've been involved with the business world, particularly the restaurant business. There are many courses available both at CONA and MUN. Like Aunt Robin, I feel that your path should follow where your interests lie. Sometimes it's hard to figure that out.
You have a very supportive, loving family who will be there to help you. But it is up to you to make the decision. The decision you make now and go through with, won't necessarily be what you end up doing but it'll contribute to expanding your world and getting you to the place you should be. I know that you are a very sensitive, caring young lady and you will succeed in whatever path you choose.
God bless you,
Love
Nanny"
and
"Hi Linda,
Uncle Mike and myself found that it's hard to decide at 19 what you really want to do the rest of your life. Don't feel bad if you decide something and it doesn't work out or you change your mind. But you will be gaining experience whatever you do.
Uncle Mike is one of the smartest (and stubbornest (sp?)) guy I know and he didn't finish his degree. He is going to finish it correspondence because he wants to further advance in Management within our institution. There is always time to get more education no matter what your age.
You will make the right decision.
Love you"
I need to choose what I want for me, what I love.. But I feel as if in order to actually know what i want I need to spend some time alone, away from here, without any influences except my own.
Perhaps I can get that out of my system this summer. Maybe not though. But everyone is so excited.
The pressure is on.
I don't know what I want to do with school. I don't know if I want to go to MUN or if it's just all these positive affirmations pushing me along until finally I need to want it for myself. There is so much pressure on me. I know everyone wants me to go to MUN, but do I want to go? I'm not saying I don't, I'm just saying I don't know if I want to do it for myself. I'm hoping this summer I can do some solo traveling to try to figure out exactly what it is that I want for me. I would like to go to a different school- somewhere outside of the province so I could experience a new place as well as do some schooling. I would like a school that's a bit smaller too. From my experience I work more successfully in smaller facilities, however, I've changed a lot since I was in a big facility (at the time, high school was big), so maybe I would do good in a big place. I know I have the brains to do whatever it is that i want to do- but WHAT I want to do is the question. I chose biology because I am doing really good at it.. Getting good grades makes me feel good. BUt do I want to do biology? What is my heart telling me? I want to teach! I know that! I want to change things! I know that! ...
I posted this on my facebook about a week ago.
"MUN or CONA....
MUN or CONA....
???????????????
Mun has lots of great things.... Cona is more affordable....
Mun has a gym with a pool..... Cona has programs that will offer me quick reward.
Mun will be a lot more work.... But in the end it will be more satisfactory...
But Cona would allow me time to travel and see the world....
But Mun has a great reputation...
Cona will allow me to get a well-paying job within the next 3-4 years..
Mun will take longer.... But there's such a diverse culture at Mun....
What do I cherish more?
Making a difference in the world... Or developing myself spiritually and artistically.
Spending my time helping others... Or devoting my time to myself and my family.
Working hard for a long time for a big goal....
Working hard every day for instant gratification...
I DON'T KNOW AHHHHH.
I don't want to be in debt, I'm already living on my own and paying bills and all that... Just to add a STUDENT LOAN on top of that!? If I go to Cona it's feasible that I could save up the money this summer.... Cona is smaller, and I work better in smaller, more hands-on environments... I could always go to Cona and do a course that allows me to transfer my credits if I desire so...
I'm so torn. I don't know what to do..
Then there's the whole other idea of perhaps applying somewhere OUTSIDE of the city... Being able to go to school while I travel and see a new place.. That sounds too ideal.. I
Any advice is welcomed....
*sigh*
-Overwhelmed Linda"
I got some really nice replies:
"Linda - I sympathize with your dilemma. But it's wonderful that you're keeping school as a priority in your life. I'm very proud of you.
The big question is what are you interested in? What courses do you want to study? What is your passion? It's ok if you don't know yet, but you may have a general idea.
One thing is for sure, you'll do better and spend more time on your studies if it is something that you enjoy and something that challenges you. Don't go for something because you think it might be easier than something else you're really interested in. I should know because that's the mistake I made.
Also, if you put the practical questions out of your mind - like money, length of time to get a degree, etc - what does your heart tell you?
I hope this helps a bit.
Love, Aunt Robin"
and
"Dear Linda,
Just read your thoughts re your future. For most, at your age, this is quite the dilemma. Many cannot pursue what they'd really like to do for many reasons - financial mainly.
You've expressed a interest in biology in the past. You've been involved with the business world, particularly the restaurant business. There are many courses available both at CONA and MUN. Like Aunt Robin, I feel that your path should follow where your interests lie. Sometimes it's hard to figure that out.
You have a very supportive, loving family who will be there to help you. But it is up to you to make the decision. The decision you make now and go through with, won't necessarily be what you end up doing but it'll contribute to expanding your world and getting you to the place you should be. I know that you are a very sensitive, caring young lady and you will succeed in whatever path you choose.
God bless you,
Love
Nanny"
and
"Hi Linda,
Uncle Mike and myself found that it's hard to decide at 19 what you really want to do the rest of your life. Don't feel bad if you decide something and it doesn't work out or you change your mind. But you will be gaining experience whatever you do.
Uncle Mike is one of the smartest (and stubbornest (sp?)) guy I know and he didn't finish his degree. He is going to finish it correspondence because he wants to further advance in Management within our institution. There is always time to get more education no matter what your age.
You will make the right decision.
Love you"
I need to choose what I want for me, what I love.. But I feel as if in order to actually know what i want I need to spend some time alone, away from here, without any influences except my own.
Perhaps I can get that out of my system this summer. Maybe not though. But everyone is so excited.
The pressure is on.
28.4.08
Rainy Day Blues
I am really not feeling good today. I am sad, foggy, confused, angry and hostile. Rotted at everyone that crosses my path, so watch out.
27.4.08
Total Hours
Monday, April 21st.
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
(2 hours)
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
(4.7 hours)
Thursday, April 24th
12:30pm-1:00pm Interviewed Lloyd
1:30pm-3:00pm Interviewed Ron
(2 hours)
Sunday April 27th
1:00pm-2:30pm Typed up Ron's report
(1.5 hours)
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
(2 hours)
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
(4.7 hours)
Thursday, April 24th
12:30pm-1:00pm Interviewed Lloyd
1:30pm-3:00pm Interviewed Ron
(2 hours)
Sunday April 27th
1:00pm-2:30pm Typed up Ron's report
(1.5 hours)
Facilitator Interview # 4 Part One- RON
Facilitator Interview 4-Part One- RON 1:30- 3:10 in school, home: 1:00-
Ron and I got together for about 2 hours. We began just chatting about stuff going on, and then I starting asking my questions for the interview.... Two hours later I had a half a page of notes and an intense feeling of enlightenment and change. However, I wasn't sure if I should include it in my research, as it was more about personal research and development than what it was intended to be. I spent the entire weekend thinking about it, and I decided that it is relevant to my research, but I have to kind of tell both sides of it to make it as relevant as possible. I need to explain my personal feelings about it, and it's role in our society.
I began our conversation by talking about voice. I wanted to hear Ron's perspective on voice in the Murphy Center. He told me that it was funny that I asked about voice because he is currently studying voice and he wanted to share his knowledge with me. He said he was going to show me a very deep quote, and he said it would take me awhile to understand it.
"Abundance must be approached from an understand that "I", or ego, can of itself do nothing, although it hypnotizes us in the illusion that it does a lot. It is the ability to instead turn your attention inward toward True Self or Universal Spirit that enables and empowers a consistent flow of abundance in your life. Positive affirmations will work to a certain degree, but only if spoken from True Self. If they are started from ego, or false 'self', its negative shadow aspect will eventually rise to the surface and create havoc with any progress made by these same affirmation. We need to address the ingrained negative beliefs first, or at least simultaneously with the positive, to experience any real success."
This quote hit me like a ton of bricks. It hit me in every aspect of my life. The way I operate and the way I believe in this theory is exact opposite.
Ron also talked about paradoxil intentions- how everything works in opposites; dark and light, hot and cold, up and down. He said when we have an idea or image we don't want, we push it to the back of our heads. It also works in opposites. If we have an image we do want we usually focus too hard on it and ultimately make it harder to obtain. For example, if you are laying in bed and you really want to get to sleep because you have a busy day tomorrow, instead of thinking about how much you want to get to sleep you should pretend you don't want to go to sleep and try to stay awake, and you'll find you fall asleep with much more ease. As with dreams, if you are taunted by a scary reoccuring dream and it causes you to be afraid and anxious, you may tend to try not to dream about those things as you fall asleep. This actually can cause you to dream more easily about what's causing you grief. If you try really hard to have this dream you will probably find as you practice this method your evil images will dissolve.
Another idea of everything working in opposites is when people try to encourage others to do "good things". If your positive affirmations aren't in line with their ingrained beliefs then they will only do good until those affirmations wear off. If you continue to tell someone that their lovely and they don't feel lovely themselves, they will continue to feel as if they aren't lovely until they themselves realize it. Also, if you're offering someone advice such as "You should get a job that give you more hours", if that advice doesn't fall in line with those persons ingrained beliefs they will just feel negatively about persistent advice. How the the speaker know they should do anything? How can you be 100% sure about what is right for someone else? You only know what I right for you (and sometimes not even then). Every individual is the only one who is in control of their actions. Offering love and support as opposed to solutions and unasked-for advice is the effective way to be a lover and a positive source of affection in someone's life.
Then Ron went back to talking about his voice. He said if I this was 10 years ago his voice would've been one of "strong encouragement" for people to do something. He felt as if he was working 10 times more than his students and in turn working against himself. "Either way you get results", he says. Now he strongly believes in accepting people as they are; unconditional acceptance. "You are perfect as you are." He feels people will work to the best of their ability in relation to the given time and circumstances if they want to do it for themselves. If someone is encouraging someone to do something they don't want to do then their hostility toward that thing will grow.
All of these theories and ideas I have experienced in many aspects of my life. In my relationship with Mike I've realized that I take his stresses and make them my stresses, and I constantly try to offer him solutions based on what I would do or I feel I should have done. I've realized this, and it's made me aware that all of the good intentions that I had to help Mike with his "problems" were actually just making him feel worse. What's been happening in my relationship has coincided with what Ron and I talked about. Mike has recently been talking about moving away to experience new things. He wants to go alone. He's recently been hostile with me and feeling depressed. I didn't realize it was my own good intentions that were doing this to him. I also didn't realize that things that he really feels strongly about-playing music, writing music- I don't feel strongly about, and I don't offer the right sympathy or love when he needs it. Now, to defend myself, I must tell you that my intentions were for the good of the both of us. I needed Mike to get a job, I needed him to get an education. I wanted him to be stress-free and happy, and I felt in my heart that if he did good things for himself then he'd feel better- and I still believe he would. But the key words in that statement are "for himself". If I am consistently nagging at him to do things (I try not to be negative about it, but he takes it that way because they aren't in line with his ingrained beliefs) than he's just going to feel more resentment towards it. I need to learn to step back and love him for him. I need to learn how to play my role as a lover and not a mother. I need to release his stresses from my conscience and allow myself and him some peace of mind.
It isn't only Mike that I do this to, it's pretty much everyone I care about. When I was 15 my dad told me that I always hurt the people that i care about, maybe this is what he meant....I do it to my brothers and Joey and my other friends. It's mostly when I see people making the same mistakes that I made, but I have to realize that they were mistakes in my life but they are different for everyone and I can't treat them as if they are my problems. It's been a pretty hard and confusing weekend. I am sad and mad at myself for virtually destroying my wonderful relationship with Mike. I am relieved because I am no longer going to allow other people's stresses to become my stresses. I am scared because I don't know if I can really do this. I am happy because I've been exposed to this whole new perspective at an early age and can perhaps save my future relationships with the things I am learning.
I also started thinking about all the things Ron and I talked about in regards to positive affirmations, but instead with me the "victim" of momentum of positive affirmation. All sorts of questions arose in my mind. Do I want to do biology? Do I love biology? Do I want to go to MUN? Do I feel I would enjoy a large school like that? What do I value more in life? I began to realized that all throughout my life I did things to allow people a certain perspective of me. I acted according to the way I thought people regarded me. Now I am here and I am conditioned to believe the ideas I've created, however I do not know if I am riding along on positive affirmations or if I will actually love this when all that fades away. My heart tells me to travel, to meet new people, to try new things and experience new cultures. The right side of my brain <*note to self: research this later> is telling me to pack up my things for a year or so, go travel and see if I can do it for me. The left side of my brain, the logical side, is telling me to go to MUN. It's telling me not to be silly.
So how does one figure out what they want to do? How do you make the final decision knowing and believing all of these things you've been enlightened to realize? I don't know... Do I just try it and if I don't like it take it as a learning experience and do something else? Do I go away first and then decide what I want to do? Do I spend time to learn about myself? Is it all a learning experience?... Yes it is. I know there is a lot of time in life to do all these things, but relevant for me at this given time in my life... I don't know.
I feel as if i haven't done this conversation justice at all. I cannot fully explain how strongly I feel about this. Maybe another time I will have some more ideas, more to say. But for now I'll just leave it at that. Ron and I decided that if we got together to meet again to actually try to answer the questionnaire, it probably wouldn't get anywhere because we'd go off topic again.. Although now I realize it's completely on topic. I've emailed Ron the questionnaire and he's going to fill it out, so I'll post part 2 when I get it.
Thanks for reading.
Linda
Ron and I got together for about 2 hours. We began just chatting about stuff going on, and then I starting asking my questions for the interview.... Two hours later I had a half a page of notes and an intense feeling of enlightenment and change. However, I wasn't sure if I should include it in my research, as it was more about personal research and development than what it was intended to be. I spent the entire weekend thinking about it, and I decided that it is relevant to my research, but I have to kind of tell both sides of it to make it as relevant as possible. I need to explain my personal feelings about it, and it's role in our society.
I began our conversation by talking about voice. I wanted to hear Ron's perspective on voice in the Murphy Center. He told me that it was funny that I asked about voice because he is currently studying voice and he wanted to share his knowledge with me. He said he was going to show me a very deep quote, and he said it would take me awhile to understand it.
"Abundance must be approached from an understand that "I", or ego, can of itself do nothing, although it hypnotizes us in the illusion that it does a lot. It is the ability to instead turn your attention inward toward True Self or Universal Spirit that enables and empowers a consistent flow of abundance in your life. Positive affirmations will work to a certain degree, but only if spoken from True Self. If they are started from ego, or false 'self', its negative shadow aspect will eventually rise to the surface and create havoc with any progress made by these same affirmation. We need to address the ingrained negative beliefs first, or at least simultaneously with the positive, to experience any real success."
This quote hit me like a ton of bricks. It hit me in every aspect of my life. The way I operate and the way I believe in this theory is exact opposite.
Ron also talked about paradoxil intentions- how everything works in opposites; dark and light, hot and cold, up and down. He said when we have an idea or image we don't want, we push it to the back of our heads. It also works in opposites. If we have an image we do want we usually focus too hard on it and ultimately make it harder to obtain. For example, if you are laying in bed and you really want to get to sleep because you have a busy day tomorrow, instead of thinking about how much you want to get to sleep you should pretend you don't want to go to sleep and try to stay awake, and you'll find you fall asleep with much more ease. As with dreams, if you are taunted by a scary reoccuring dream and it causes you to be afraid and anxious, you may tend to try not to dream about those things as you fall asleep. This actually can cause you to dream more easily about what's causing you grief. If you try really hard to have this dream you will probably find as you practice this method your evil images will dissolve.
Another idea of everything working in opposites is when people try to encourage others to do "good things". If your positive affirmations aren't in line with their ingrained beliefs then they will only do good until those affirmations wear off. If you continue to tell someone that their lovely and they don't feel lovely themselves, they will continue to feel as if they aren't lovely until they themselves realize it. Also, if you're offering someone advice such as "You should get a job that give you more hours", if that advice doesn't fall in line with those persons ingrained beliefs they will just feel negatively about persistent advice. How the the speaker know they should do anything? How can you be 100% sure about what is right for someone else? You only know what I right for you (and sometimes not even then). Every individual is the only one who is in control of their actions. Offering love and support as opposed to solutions and unasked-for advice is the effective way to be a lover and a positive source of affection in someone's life.
Then Ron went back to talking about his voice. He said if I this was 10 years ago his voice would've been one of "strong encouragement" for people to do something. He felt as if he was working 10 times more than his students and in turn working against himself. "Either way you get results", he says. Now he strongly believes in accepting people as they are; unconditional acceptance. "You are perfect as you are." He feels people will work to the best of their ability in relation to the given time and circumstances if they want to do it for themselves. If someone is encouraging someone to do something they don't want to do then their hostility toward that thing will grow.
All of these theories and ideas I have experienced in many aspects of my life. In my relationship with Mike I've realized that I take his stresses and make them my stresses, and I constantly try to offer him solutions based on what I would do or I feel I should have done. I've realized this, and it's made me aware that all of the good intentions that I had to help Mike with his "problems" were actually just making him feel worse. What's been happening in my relationship has coincided with what Ron and I talked about. Mike has recently been talking about moving away to experience new things. He wants to go alone. He's recently been hostile with me and feeling depressed. I didn't realize it was my own good intentions that were doing this to him. I also didn't realize that things that he really feels strongly about-playing music, writing music- I don't feel strongly about, and I don't offer the right sympathy or love when he needs it. Now, to defend myself, I must tell you that my intentions were for the good of the both of us. I needed Mike to get a job, I needed him to get an education. I wanted him to be stress-free and happy, and I felt in my heart that if he did good things for himself then he'd feel better- and I still believe he would. But the key words in that statement are "for himself". If I am consistently nagging at him to do things (I try not to be negative about it, but he takes it that way because they aren't in line with his ingrained beliefs) than he's just going to feel more resentment towards it. I need to learn to step back and love him for him. I need to learn how to play my role as a lover and not a mother. I need to release his stresses from my conscience and allow myself and him some peace of mind.
It isn't only Mike that I do this to, it's pretty much everyone I care about. When I was 15 my dad told me that I always hurt the people that i care about, maybe this is what he meant....I do it to my brothers and Joey and my other friends. It's mostly when I see people making the same mistakes that I made, but I have to realize that they were mistakes in my life but they are different for everyone and I can't treat them as if they are my problems. It's been a pretty hard and confusing weekend. I am sad and mad at myself for virtually destroying my wonderful relationship with Mike. I am relieved because I am no longer going to allow other people's stresses to become my stresses. I am scared because I don't know if I can really do this. I am happy because I've been exposed to this whole new perspective at an early age and can perhaps save my future relationships with the things I am learning.
I also started thinking about all the things Ron and I talked about in regards to positive affirmations, but instead with me the "victim" of momentum of positive affirmation. All sorts of questions arose in my mind. Do I want to do biology? Do I love biology? Do I want to go to MUN? Do I feel I would enjoy a large school like that? What do I value more in life? I began to realized that all throughout my life I did things to allow people a certain perspective of me. I acted according to the way I thought people regarded me. Now I am here and I am conditioned to believe the ideas I've created, however I do not know if I am riding along on positive affirmations or if I will actually love this when all that fades away. My heart tells me to travel, to meet new people, to try new things and experience new cultures. The right side of my brain <*note to self: research this later> is telling me to pack up my things for a year or so, go travel and see if I can do it for me. The left side of my brain, the logical side, is telling me to go to MUN. It's telling me not to be silly.
So how does one figure out what they want to do? How do you make the final decision knowing and believing all of these things you've been enlightened to realize? I don't know... Do I just try it and if I don't like it take it as a learning experience and do something else? Do I go away first and then decide what I want to do? Do I spend time to learn about myself? Is it all a learning experience?... Yes it is. I know there is a lot of time in life to do all these things, but relevant for me at this given time in my life... I don't know.
I feel as if i haven't done this conversation justice at all. I cannot fully explain how strongly I feel about this. Maybe another time I will have some more ideas, more to say. But for now I'll just leave it at that. Ron and I decided that if we got together to meet again to actually try to answer the questionnaire, it probably wouldn't get anywhere because we'd go off topic again.. Although now I realize it's completely on topic. I've emailed Ron the questionnaire and he's going to fill it out, so I'll post part 2 when I get it.
Thanks for reading.
Linda
26.4.08
Updates to be done
I have hours to log and interviews to publish.. however, I needed a break this weekend. Keep posted for updates in the following week.
Be excited, because it's gonna be good.
PS: Linda is currently accepting donations.
:)
Be excited, because it's gonna be good.
PS: Linda is currently accepting donations.
:)
22.4.08
Brainstorming on Enrichment.
I had a new idea. Something I failed to realize.
Advances courses!! AP Psychology, as an INDEPENDENT! I know it sounds radical. But hear me out. When I was in high school I took AP Psychology. I was interested in it, AND it was a university credit course. I studied hard because it interested me and I went to some classes. I dropped out of school with only three months left. I came back to write my exam and I got an 85 in the course. If there were advances courses, enrichment, or some kind of post-secondary pre-course it would benefit greatly to the population of people who could use it. It could be independent. There could also be pre-nursing, advanced writing, advanced sciences, advances math, introduction to law, etc. Perhaps if you offered these courses you would require a fee, and therefore be able to collect some money to go towards the function of the centre. I never even realized, but the things that I need are things like these. I could relate to peoples issues with the school and certainly understand them, but I didn't exactly need the changes like they did. What I do need is more opportunity, more choice, more leadership, and ultimately, more opportunities for success.
Advances courses!! AP Psychology, as an INDEPENDENT! I know it sounds radical. But hear me out. When I was in high school I took AP Psychology. I was interested in it, AND it was a university credit course. I studied hard because it interested me and I went to some classes. I dropped out of school with only three months left. I came back to write my exam and I got an 85 in the course. If there were advances courses, enrichment, or some kind of post-secondary pre-course it would benefit greatly to the population of people who could use it. It could be independent. There could also be pre-nursing, advanced writing, advanced sciences, advances math, introduction to law, etc. Perhaps if you offered these courses you would require a fee, and therefore be able to collect some money to go towards the function of the centre. I never even realized, but the things that I need are things like these. I could relate to peoples issues with the school and certainly understand them, but I didn't exactly need the changes like they did. What I do need is more opportunity, more choice, more leadership, and ultimately, more opportunities for success.
Total hours
Monday, April 21st.
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
12-1: Interviewed Trudy
3-4: Typed up report
Tuesday, April 22nd.
12-12:45 Interviewed Bren
1:30-2:55 Interviewed Jeff
5:2o-6:10 Typed up Bren's report
6:10-7:50Typed up Jeff's report
facilitator interview # 3- Jeff
Facilitator Interview #3- JEFF
Jeff and I got together and I have to admit, this was probably the most informative session I have encountered. Jeff has been with the center for 21 years, and he has seen a lot of stuff. Wow. I don't even know where to start. This entry might be slightly unorganized, but our topics bounced around. I'll do my best.
When Jeff and I sat down I explained a little about my goals for our meeting. I wanted to talk about student voice. The words student voice triggered some ideas for Jeff about having a school newspaper. He said that the Murphy Centre has a newspaper before. He likes the idea of a monthly publication made by students for students. It could include poetry, accomplishments, suggestions and comments, info on upcoming events. I think this is a wonderful idea for many reasons. It would encourage people to share their talents be it writing, drawing, or cartooning. It would act as an in-school part-time job for students and be rewarding and fun to participate in. Jeff suggested the name Student Voice for the paper. I think this is so cool, and very do-able! It would also assist in students sharing their voice, as you could have an Opinions column.
Jeff and I then moved on to briefly talk about student voice. I asked Jeff if he felt he allowed people to express their voice in his class, and he said, "Be awful dull if they didn't".
Then we got into the topic of a wish list. I asked him what he would like to see if anything was possible. He expressed that he would like more staff, and therefore more variety. Jeff feels very strongly about seeing more variety in any kinds of courses that are of interest. He said to be able to make time for these things there could be five shortened periods in a day, therefore allowing more classes per day. He told me that years ago there used to be five and six periods in a day!
He talked about the changes coming in the new high school programs. Art is going to be mandatory and therefore the Murphy Centre is going to have to include art as it will be a graduation requirement. I asked him if he meant high school art classes, or extracurricular art and he replied, "whatever we can fit in". He said scheduling is tight, but it is do-able. He also talked about incorporating healthy living into the schedule once a week, and being able to use to CONA gym would be a possibility. Again, Jeff feels strongly about more variety, and expressed that he would be willing to do the work to provide more courses to people. Later on in the conversation he said he would like to teach earth systems, and would be willing to take on the work required to do so.
I then asked Jeff the big question: Would you prefer to see a completely new, alternative curriculum come into the Murphy Centre alongside the current curriculum, or would you prefer a whole new facility be created specifically for an alternative curriculum? Jeff feels as if it would be very hard to bring a completely alternative curriculum here, however he had the idea of having some alternative courses alongside our regular curriculum. He was especially interested in things that are of interest to him, such as canoing, hiking, camping, and compass reading. He talked about how the Murphy Centre (way back when) had a shop and offered automotive, electrical and woodworking. He said, "Then there were too many people in those careers so the high schools said 'Stop offering it', so they stopped". He said it was good for those students who were academically or emotionally prepared to go back to school, but it helped them ease their way into that kind of environment again.
Then I moved on to talk about the challenge the Murphy Centre faces when it has to turn down people because they need a modified program, such as Pathway 3 & 4 people, or people with severe learning disabilities. He informed me that there is a rising number of people applying that are in that position, but we're not equipped to handle a big group of modified students. This then brought our conversation to the idea of a new alternative learning facility. He agreed that these people would greatly benefit from a place like this. Later in the conversation Jeff told me that the Murphy Centre started as a three year pilot project and was funded by the federal government. After the third year they pretty much just told them that they were going to have to find their own funding. Since then they've been relying on yearly grants and sponsors who provide an estimate of $700-$900 thousand dollars a year to keep the Murphy Centre open. With this knowledge, I suggested that perhaps with these new demands in place from a growing demographic of people who need a modified learning facility, perhaps we have a better case to put forth a proposal to the government for permanent funding. Jeff told me that majority of the other provinces have many places like the Murphy Centre within their regular district of schools. All these factors I think could contribute to something very big.
This conversation quickly Jeff talking about the need to decide what alternative is going to mean. I think it's something that needs a lot of input, and a lot of consideration before it is answered. One method that is considered alternative, Jeff explained, is something he heard about in Quebec called project based learning. He told me that a lot of professionals nowadays disagree with testing and feel it limits a persons capabilities, causes stress and anxiety, and overall proves less effective than project based learning. This method allows more creativity and a higher success rate. Apparently Quebec has enforced this type of learning all over the province. He believes this type of learning is a good idea for an alternative facility, and would benefit those people who need modified learning.
I then asked Jeff if we could change the direction of the conversation a talk a little about peer-teacher relationships in the Murphy Centre. He says that he doesn't look down on anyone, and he sees them on an eye-to-eye level. He said sometimes when he needs to get serious about attention of grades it can be hard because they get on such a personal level, but he feels the good outweighs the bad in the aspect.
Then I asked Jeff if there was anything else he'd wish for if anything was possible. He said the pay is a little low- lower than normal high schools- and that was when he told me about the funding issues that I mentioned above. He expressed that he feels that for some reason the NL government just doesn't want the Murphy Centre to fit because it's sometimes viewed as less in comparison to normal high school. Other provinces have places like the Murphy Centre and they are government funded, so why not here? I personally think this issue deserves to have a little hell raised for it.
I then moved on to ask Jeff what his biggest frustrations at the Murphy Centre are. He said attendance is a frustration. He said it's a frustration when you have to get through something and you can't because classes are inconsistent. Jeff teaches ABE sciences as well as geography and told me that his ABE students are funded to be in school, so they are usually there unless they have a doctors note. He said if there was an incentive like that for everyone than more people would likely stay. I asked what kinds of things the Murphy Centre had tried in the past to improve attendance and Jeff told me about such things as: giving up the attendance policy as a way of relieving pressure; contracts that students had to sign to say they would come and if they didn't they would be asked to leave; advisers; colour groups- regular meetings with staff and participants. He said that the colour groups may work again, and they may not. He said it's different for every group you get. Sometimes people are more attentive and committed, and sometimes they're not. Jeff said that this semester has been the worst semester he's seen in ages, in regards to the drop out rate. He is interested in getting together to discuss the ways of addressing attendance.
Jeff and I talked about the policies in the school dealing with attendance, he told me that the staff has difficulty letting people go and that they don't really follow their own policies. He said that this is supposed to be for the participants success and he doesn't feel that the lack of policy in that area is necessarily a negative thing. Jeff told me he'd love to see how the participants feel about attendance, and he feels as if someone got together and showed each participant how much time they've actually missed that they'd be surprised. I think this is a future project that I may take on. We could discuss the possibility of asking participants to meet individually and talk about their attendance.
The topic of student voice arose again, and Jeff told me that at one time students were invited to be present and participate in staff meetings. He said there were issues around that regarding confidentiality, and that students wouldn't be invited to some staff meetings that were held to talk about a particular individual. However, he said that it would be a good idea to have staff-participant meetings that aren't about specific individuals, but rather around things like smoking, drugs, etc. The consistency of this idea would vary depending on the dedication of the participants. "Some people are dedicated at first, but then it melts down to a few people doing all the work", Jeff said, "It depends on the crowd if you're going to be successful or not".
The idea of involving participants in the development of a new advisory process arose. Jeff and I agreed it would be beneficial to understand what we can do to help participants get where they need to go. He would like to see participants come up with some kind of system to hold themselves accountable instead of the facilitators. Jeff expressed interest in the idea of a buddy-system, where peers would help each other out, perhaps term to term, and provide a support system. He believes that peers would have an easier time talking to each other about their issues or ideas than they would to a facilitator, especially about attendance issues.
I wanted to talk a bit about how Jeff incorporates an alternative flare in his teaching, and he told me one really good specific example of what he does that is alternative and that's with his environmental science class. The book, he tells me, was made in Newfoundland and is very outdated. He's actually had to create a new curriculum that's up-to-date based on his knowledge. He also allows more time for tests, he's flexible on extending deadlines, lenient on test dates, and allows people to work at their levels. I asked Jeff what he thought the difference was between him and a "regular" high school teacher, and he said he's more easy going and he doesn't mind talking about things outside education, such as what participants did on the weekend and what kinds of things they like. He likes writing notes on the board because he can condense it down and make it in point form and he can be assured that people are getting exactly what they need. He feels his style his similar to that of a university professor. Jeff feels as if he does his best to accommodate peoples learning styles and he is open to suggestions to what may improve his teaching. He says he needs to stay in the realm of legitimacy (you get the requirements to go to post-secondary).
I am very excited about this interview. Jeff invited me to get together again to talk about the historical background of the Murphy Centre. I am going to take this on in the near future. I think we could discuss things that have already been done and assess the outcome of them. We can see if we could try some again or if we could revise some and try them with different methods. This is something I look forward to in the future and I'm sure it'll be a really informative thing to do. Experimenting with ideas is definitely the only way to figure out what works and what does not.
Jeff and I got together and I have to admit, this was probably the most informative session I have encountered. Jeff has been with the center for 21 years, and he has seen a lot of stuff. Wow. I don't even know where to start. This entry might be slightly unorganized, but our topics bounced around. I'll do my best.
When Jeff and I sat down I explained a little about my goals for our meeting. I wanted to talk about student voice. The words student voice triggered some ideas for Jeff about having a school newspaper. He said that the Murphy Centre has a newspaper before. He likes the idea of a monthly publication made by students for students. It could include poetry, accomplishments, suggestions and comments, info on upcoming events. I think this is a wonderful idea for many reasons. It would encourage people to share their talents be it writing, drawing, or cartooning. It would act as an in-school part-time job for students and be rewarding and fun to participate in. Jeff suggested the name Student Voice for the paper. I think this is so cool, and very do-able! It would also assist in students sharing their voice, as you could have an Opinions column.
Jeff and I then moved on to briefly talk about student voice. I asked Jeff if he felt he allowed people to express their voice in his class, and he said, "Be awful dull if they didn't".
Then we got into the topic of a wish list. I asked him what he would like to see if anything was possible. He expressed that he would like more staff, and therefore more variety. Jeff feels very strongly about seeing more variety in any kinds of courses that are of interest. He said to be able to make time for these things there could be five shortened periods in a day, therefore allowing more classes per day. He told me that years ago there used to be five and six periods in a day!
He talked about the changes coming in the new high school programs. Art is going to be mandatory and therefore the Murphy Centre is going to have to include art as it will be a graduation requirement. I asked him if he meant high school art classes, or extracurricular art and he replied, "whatever we can fit in". He said scheduling is tight, but it is do-able. He also talked about incorporating healthy living into the schedule once a week, and being able to use to CONA gym would be a possibility. Again, Jeff feels strongly about more variety, and expressed that he would be willing to do the work to provide more courses to people. Later on in the conversation he said he would like to teach earth systems, and would be willing to take on the work required to do so.
I then asked Jeff the big question: Would you prefer to see a completely new, alternative curriculum come into the Murphy Centre alongside the current curriculum, or would you prefer a whole new facility be created specifically for an alternative curriculum? Jeff feels as if it would be very hard to bring a completely alternative curriculum here, however he had the idea of having some alternative courses alongside our regular curriculum. He was especially interested in things that are of interest to him, such as canoing, hiking, camping, and compass reading. He talked about how the Murphy Centre (way back when) had a shop and offered automotive, electrical and woodworking. He said, "Then there were too many people in those careers so the high schools said 'Stop offering it', so they stopped". He said it was good for those students who were academically or emotionally prepared to go back to school, but it helped them ease their way into that kind of environment again.
Then I moved on to talk about the challenge the Murphy Centre faces when it has to turn down people because they need a modified program, such as Pathway 3 & 4 people, or people with severe learning disabilities. He informed me that there is a rising number of people applying that are in that position, but we're not equipped to handle a big group of modified students. This then brought our conversation to the idea of a new alternative learning facility. He agreed that these people would greatly benefit from a place like this. Later in the conversation Jeff told me that the Murphy Centre started as a three year pilot project and was funded by the federal government. After the third year they pretty much just told them that they were going to have to find their own funding. Since then they've been relying on yearly grants and sponsors who provide an estimate of $700-$900 thousand dollars a year to keep the Murphy Centre open. With this knowledge, I suggested that perhaps with these new demands in place from a growing demographic of people who need a modified learning facility, perhaps we have a better case to put forth a proposal to the government for permanent funding. Jeff told me that majority of the other provinces have many places like the Murphy Centre within their regular district of schools. All these factors I think could contribute to something very big.
This conversation quickly Jeff talking about the need to decide what alternative is going to mean. I think it's something that needs a lot of input, and a lot of consideration before it is answered. One method that is considered alternative, Jeff explained, is something he heard about in Quebec called project based learning. He told me that a lot of professionals nowadays disagree with testing and feel it limits a persons capabilities, causes stress and anxiety, and overall proves less effective than project based learning. This method allows more creativity and a higher success rate. Apparently Quebec has enforced this type of learning all over the province. He believes this type of learning is a good idea for an alternative facility, and would benefit those people who need modified learning.
I then asked Jeff if we could change the direction of the conversation a talk a little about peer-teacher relationships in the Murphy Centre. He says that he doesn't look down on anyone, and he sees them on an eye-to-eye level. He said sometimes when he needs to get serious about attention of grades it can be hard because they get on such a personal level, but he feels the good outweighs the bad in the aspect.
Then I asked Jeff if there was anything else he'd wish for if anything was possible. He said the pay is a little low- lower than normal high schools- and that was when he told me about the funding issues that I mentioned above. He expressed that he feels that for some reason the NL government just doesn't want the Murphy Centre to fit because it's sometimes viewed as less in comparison to normal high school. Other provinces have places like the Murphy Centre and they are government funded, so why not here? I personally think this issue deserves to have a little hell raised for it.
I then moved on to ask Jeff what his biggest frustrations at the Murphy Centre are. He said attendance is a frustration. He said it's a frustration when you have to get through something and you can't because classes are inconsistent. Jeff teaches ABE sciences as well as geography and told me that his ABE students are funded to be in school, so they are usually there unless they have a doctors note. He said if there was an incentive like that for everyone than more people would likely stay. I asked what kinds of things the Murphy Centre had tried in the past to improve attendance and Jeff told me about such things as: giving up the attendance policy as a way of relieving pressure; contracts that students had to sign to say they would come and if they didn't they would be asked to leave; advisers; colour groups- regular meetings with staff and participants. He said that the colour groups may work again, and they may not. He said it's different for every group you get. Sometimes people are more attentive and committed, and sometimes they're not. Jeff said that this semester has been the worst semester he's seen in ages, in regards to the drop out rate. He is interested in getting together to discuss the ways of addressing attendance.
Jeff and I talked about the policies in the school dealing with attendance, he told me that the staff has difficulty letting people go and that they don't really follow their own policies. He said that this is supposed to be for the participants success and he doesn't feel that the lack of policy in that area is necessarily a negative thing. Jeff told me he'd love to see how the participants feel about attendance, and he feels as if someone got together and showed each participant how much time they've actually missed that they'd be surprised. I think this is a future project that I may take on. We could discuss the possibility of asking participants to meet individually and talk about their attendance.
The topic of student voice arose again, and Jeff told me that at one time students were invited to be present and participate in staff meetings. He said there were issues around that regarding confidentiality, and that students wouldn't be invited to some staff meetings that were held to talk about a particular individual. However, he said that it would be a good idea to have staff-participant meetings that aren't about specific individuals, but rather around things like smoking, drugs, etc. The consistency of this idea would vary depending on the dedication of the participants. "Some people are dedicated at first, but then it melts down to a few people doing all the work", Jeff said, "It depends on the crowd if you're going to be successful or not".
The idea of involving participants in the development of a new advisory process arose. Jeff and I agreed it would be beneficial to understand what we can do to help participants get where they need to go. He would like to see participants come up with some kind of system to hold themselves accountable instead of the facilitators. Jeff expressed interest in the idea of a buddy-system, where peers would help each other out, perhaps term to term, and provide a support system. He believes that peers would have an easier time talking to each other about their issues or ideas than they would to a facilitator, especially about attendance issues.
I wanted to talk a bit about how Jeff incorporates an alternative flare in his teaching, and he told me one really good specific example of what he does that is alternative and that's with his environmental science class. The book, he tells me, was made in Newfoundland and is very outdated. He's actually had to create a new curriculum that's up-to-date based on his knowledge. He also allows more time for tests, he's flexible on extending deadlines, lenient on test dates, and allows people to work at their levels. I asked Jeff what he thought the difference was between him and a "regular" high school teacher, and he said he's more easy going and he doesn't mind talking about things outside education, such as what participants did on the weekend and what kinds of things they like. He likes writing notes on the board because he can condense it down and make it in point form and he can be assured that people are getting exactly what they need. He feels his style his similar to that of a university professor. Jeff feels as if he does his best to accommodate peoples learning styles and he is open to suggestions to what may improve his teaching. He says he needs to stay in the realm of legitimacy (you get the requirements to go to post-secondary).
I am very excited about this interview. Jeff invited me to get together again to talk about the historical background of the Murphy Centre. I am going to take this on in the near future. I think we could discuss things that have already been done and assess the outcome of them. We can see if we could try some again or if we could revise some and try them with different methods. This is something I look forward to in the future and I'm sure it'll be a really informative thing to do. Experimenting with ideas is definitely the only way to figure out what works and what does not.
Facilitator Interview #2
Facilitator Interview #2 - BREN
My conververstion with Bren went very well. I got him to open up a little bit, and that's an accomplishment! I informed him of the ideas that our group has compiled, and talked a little bit about how I was interested in his ideas and views of student voice and his own voice. He started by saying that he was very interested in what people have to say, and would like to hear more about student needs. He said he likes when people to come to him and he does his best to help people. I asked him about his views on staff members being uncomftable about allowing students too much voice, as they may take advantage or not see it as a responsibility. He could relate to that. He said he likes to know the opinions and ideas of participants, and when it comes to the amount of authority associated with that voice then there is some question about how much voice should be allowed. He said it was the concept of who has the final say, really. I talked about the notion of having a committ that collectively agreed on decisions, and if you had issues on any given situation than you could raise it and have a fair say in what happens. He liked that idea, and agreed that if someone was to go ahead and do something that he didn't want that he would like to voice his opinion about it and have a fair say.
Bren felt strongly about people's voices around attendance. The issue of attendance itself does frusterate Bren, but he is more interested in hearing about peoples issues with attendance and trying to find a solution that way. I agreed that it would be interesting to talk to participants about their attendance. He would like to have a discussion with individual people on why attendance is bad, and try to address the issue according to the person's unique situation. I think this is a very wonderful quality, as people are so diverse and unique that their education needs to be as well. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to regard it on an individual basis. Perhaps it seems like a large-scaled task right now in this day in age- SO many students, such big educational facilities. However, if teachers were trained in the complexity of addressing students individual needs (some, like Bren and Trudy, don't need to be trained hehe ) than the education system would be so much better.
Our conversation about attendance led to us talking about Bren, as a teacher, being aware of a person's progress in their academics. I suggested that a more organized advisory process might be a step in the right direction and perhaps proove a good solution. Bren then agreed that he finds the advisory process isn't doing what it needs to be doing. I talked about advisers needed to keep their own personal style, but maybe getting together to collaborate on a unified advisory process. He agreed and told me he would like to see a generel or even specific outline on how to do it. He said he feels like he doesn't do a good job even though he emphasized that he always tries to ask people how their doing whenever he sees them. I asked him what would make help him to do a better job, and he said he'd feel better if there was a general outline to follow to remind you the things you need to ask.
I then brought up the idea of alternative curriculum. I asked Bren how he makes his current curriculum as alternative as possible. Bren replied that he wouldn't consider what he does alternative, but as we continued talking it came to light that a lot of his methods are very alternative. He seemed pleased by this and that made me happy. Bren explained to me that he has to get a lot of work done in a small amount of time, so what we learn compared to what high schools learn is condensed into what's on the exam and the public. I continued with that to talk about how that is suitable for a majority of people who don't care for the course and want to get it done and move on, and for another majority it's a downpoint because they are actually interested in biology and would like to learn more than what's offered. Either way, his methods of giving you all the notes in worksheets and then with that corrosponding review questions, is very hard to do bad if you put the time into it. This is very alternative to the high school program where you are expected to use books and search for the information yourself. This quality itself has it's positive and negative sides, but it is efficient for getting the grade and graduating. Bren chooses to hand out worksheets and review questions to people pre-typed instead of giving notes because he wants to have all the material for every even if they are absent. This is his method of ensuring that you get every single note, definition, graph and diagram you need. This is a pro in the sense that you have the information and given that you study you can do good. It's a con in the sense that a lot of people need to be forced into reading by taking notes and some people may just fill out the answers once and then never look at them again and therefore do poorly.
I wanted to move on as time was running short, so I quickly got Bren to list a few other changes, enhancements or improvements that he'd like to see. He said that time was limited to getting through the basic essentials, but if he were to get some new lab equipment he could find the time to use them. He was interested in new microscopes, and he talked about a computer software program that apparently has virtual labs and stuff on it that could assit in his teaching! He knows about a program that you can run on the new computers (becuase they're good enough) and it has physics experiments on it and different tools he could use to make up for a real lab.
I also interviewed Jeff today. I'll be posting that later.
Peace and Love.
My conververstion with Bren went very well. I got him to open up a little bit, and that's an accomplishment! I informed him of the ideas that our group has compiled, and talked a little bit about how I was interested in his ideas and views of student voice and his own voice. He started by saying that he was very interested in what people have to say, and would like to hear more about student needs. He said he likes when people to come to him and he does his best to help people. I asked him about his views on staff members being uncomftable about allowing students too much voice, as they may take advantage or not see it as a responsibility. He could relate to that. He said he likes to know the opinions and ideas of participants, and when it comes to the amount of authority associated with that voice then there is some question about how much voice should be allowed. He said it was the concept of who has the final say, really. I talked about the notion of having a committ that collectively agreed on decisions, and if you had issues on any given situation than you could raise it and have a fair say in what happens. He liked that idea, and agreed that if someone was to go ahead and do something that he didn't want that he would like to voice his opinion about it and have a fair say.
Bren felt strongly about people's voices around attendance. The issue of attendance itself does frusterate Bren, but he is more interested in hearing about peoples issues with attendance and trying to find a solution that way. I agreed that it would be interesting to talk to participants about their attendance. He would like to have a discussion with individual people on why attendance is bad, and try to address the issue according to the person's unique situation. I think this is a very wonderful quality, as people are so diverse and unique that their education needs to be as well. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to regard it on an individual basis. Perhaps it seems like a large-scaled task right now in this day in age- SO many students, such big educational facilities. However, if teachers were trained in the complexity of addressing students individual needs (some, like Bren and Trudy, don't need to be trained hehe ) than the education system would be so much better.
Our conversation about attendance led to us talking about Bren, as a teacher, being aware of a person's progress in their academics. I suggested that a more organized advisory process might be a step in the right direction and perhaps proove a good solution. Bren then agreed that he finds the advisory process isn't doing what it needs to be doing. I talked about advisers needed to keep their own personal style, but maybe getting together to collaborate on a unified advisory process. He agreed and told me he would like to see a generel or even specific outline on how to do it. He said he feels like he doesn't do a good job even though he emphasized that he always tries to ask people how their doing whenever he sees them. I asked him what would make help him to do a better job, and he said he'd feel better if there was a general outline to follow to remind you the things you need to ask.
I then brought up the idea of alternative curriculum. I asked Bren how he makes his current curriculum as alternative as possible. Bren replied that he wouldn't consider what he does alternative, but as we continued talking it came to light that a lot of his methods are very alternative. He seemed pleased by this and that made me happy. Bren explained to me that he has to get a lot of work done in a small amount of time, so what we learn compared to what high schools learn is condensed into what's on the exam and the public. I continued with that to talk about how that is suitable for a majority of people who don't care for the course and want to get it done and move on, and for another majority it's a downpoint because they are actually interested in biology and would like to learn more than what's offered. Either way, his methods of giving you all the notes in worksheets and then with that corrosponding review questions, is very hard to do bad if you put the time into it. This is very alternative to the high school program where you are expected to use books and search for the information yourself. This quality itself has it's positive and negative sides, but it is efficient for getting the grade and graduating. Bren chooses to hand out worksheets and review questions to people pre-typed instead of giving notes because he wants to have all the material for every even if they are absent. This is his method of ensuring that you get every single note, definition, graph and diagram you need. This is a pro in the sense that you have the information and given that you study you can do good. It's a con in the sense that a lot of people need to be forced into reading by taking notes and some people may just fill out the answers once and then never look at them again and therefore do poorly.
I wanted to move on as time was running short, so I quickly got Bren to list a few other changes, enhancements or improvements that he'd like to see. He said that time was limited to getting through the basic essentials, but if he were to get some new lab equipment he could find the time to use them. He was interested in new microscopes, and he talked about a computer software program that apparently has virtual labs and stuff on it that could assit in his teaching! He knows about a program that you can run on the new computers (becuase they're good enough) and it has physics experiments on it and different tools he could use to make up for a real lab.
I also interviewed Jeff today. I'll be posting that later.
Peace and Love.
21.4.08
For my records:
Blog post April 21st. Interview with Trudy.
Hey Trudy, feel free to add anything you thing of!
Hey All!
The meeting today was canceled due to lack of people available to come. We should talk to everyone and see when the best day would be to reschedule. I think we should also discuss what will happen if people aren't able to attend- I think we should move on and allow people time to catch up whenever they're available.
I did get to meet with Trudy today for my first one-on-one interview with a staff member. I didn't get to tape record it due to the fact that Shoppers had no audio tapes and Coffee Matters refused to let me use my laptop during lunch hours, so I took some good notes.
I wasn't sure whether I'd like to share my interviews as they happen or if I would compile a collection of stories and then post, but I was so damn excited by our conversation that I decided I will post them as they happen. We can always go over it again after and put them all together.
I began by having Trudy read over our list of ideas and the ideas we collected during our participant idea session. Then I got her to read over the facilitator questionnaire. I started by asking her what she thought about the list already compiled. Her first response: funding. For majority of our ideas we need some sort of funding for either materials or to pay staff. So I pointed out question number 3 on the questionnaire, and asked her if she could try to speak as if ANYTHING were possible, despite costs. I wanted to get her ideas out before talking about the complications or challenges. She said she'd like to see a wider variety of courses offered: other courses within the high school program, more electives, and more alternative courses as well. She gave examples like the 3 sciences, art, French, more English, socials... Another change Trudy would like to see is more flexibility with which courses are available as independent courses, and more choice for participants in regards this.
Then we moved on to talk something that Trudy feels very strongly about- attendance. She wishes that "there were 90% of the people there 90% of the time". She says it's her biggest barrier as a teacher, and interferes with her teaching, and others' learning. I asked her if she had any ideas about how to keep people in school, and she did not. This seems to be a very frustrating thing for her (and a lot of other teachers) as it is such a complex issue. Thus, in my opinion, in need of serious consideration.
I then went on to ask her how she felt the Murphy Center offers the traditional curriculum in the most alternative way it can. She mentioned that it offers more flexibility than regular high schools, it has smaller class sizes, people can have more time for tests, and in a lot of courses (except publics) she can deliver the curriculum in a way that is more relevant to any individual (she can do this in her writing class, and Ann in her human dynamics). She says that courses with public exams are constraints because you have to focus only on the material given. She loves the semester system, however it's a disadvantage in the regard that it doesn't allow much time for other things.
The conversation then went on to talk about student voice. Trudy feels as if the Murphy Center should be more student-led, especially with big issues like ones we've faced this year: Drugs and violence. She says right now these things are dealt with by the staff; they develop policies and then deliver these policies to the participants. She would like to see these kinds of issues being dealt with by students, or by a combination of staff and students. She feels as if a problem with this is that a lot of staff members do not feel comfortable allowing students too much voice. I found this very interesting, and we went on to discuss that the fear is there that student's may not see it as an important responsibility and take advantage of their position. Another issue was that there could be too much apathy, and empathy. Apathy in the sense that students may not see the issues being dealt with as serious or significant, and empathy in the sense that they may feel guilty because they may partake in the same activities but just never got caught. Trudy feels that a student council might be a good thing, and she also feels as if it may not work, but it should be attempted. She went on to say that she doesn't feel the traditional high school student council would be appropriate, because it's not a collaborative model, but some kind of student leadership group that sits with staff on a regular basis and goes over what's what. She liked the idea of a J.C!
Then Trudy and I discussed comfort levels at the Murphy Center. "The Murphy Center is the only place I've worked where I feel I can bring my whole self to work." Trudy told me a story about a few times during the first year she was working at the Murphy Center. Tim called her into his office to talk and she was always afraid that he was going to tell her that she was being inappropriate and that she'd have to be less personal and more professional. However, that never happened, and after awhile Trudy realized Tim was never going to lecture her for that. She had been in that situation in past jobs where she felt as if being herself was inappropriate and she had to leave pieces of herself at home, but at the Murphy Center it's not like that. I asked her if she thought this kind of attitude was apparent in students as well, and if she had observed this kind of behavior from students. She explained to me that most people are very comfortable- in the classroom, with their friends. But it's not just a matter of if they're comfortable talking to being outgoing, it was also people comfortable to not say anything at all. She said that there are a lot of people in the Murphy Center with social anxiety (for whatever reason), and it's a good atmosphere for them because they don't have to worry if someone is going to single them out and make them speak. If you want to speak, speak all you want. If you prefer to stay quite, that's good too. I think that's a very special quality about our school- you can be who you are and no one makes you act any different! Trudy is also pleased with the lack of bullying that goes on at the Murphy Center. We talked about how a lot of the participants are where they are today because they were bullied and high school and didn't make it through. Another majority of the participants were the bullies- the "bad" kids that pipped off or did drugs and may have been the bullies. Trudy thinks it's amazing how these two types of people can co-exist at the Murphy Center and (usually) never think anything of it!
I asked Trudy if she wouldn't mind if we moved on to talking about curriculum. Then I threw out the question: Could you see us introducing an entirely new, alternative curriculum here at the Murphy Center alongside the current system, or would you prefer to see it in a different facility altogether? Trudy feels as if it would be difficult to start a completely alternative curriculum at the Murphy Center, but she loves the idea of a new facility for just that! She supported her feelings for that by talking about people with significant learning and cognitive difficulties. Being someone who deals with intake at the Murphy Center, Trudy had a very heartbreaking story about turning someone away from the Murphy Center. A man in his mid-twenties had applied for the fall semester and was in for his interview. He had a severe learning disability, and because the Murphy Center doesn't have the resources, programs or supports for that man, he was turned away. When he asked what to do next, Trudy could only tell him that there was nothing- this was the end of the line. She feels as if people in this sad situation would benefit from a completely alternative leaning facility. The type of program the man needs is offered in a regular high school, but being in his mid-twenties he was too old to go back to one. In an alternative facility he would be able to learn life skills and job readiness, as well as being able to get a high school diploma. Trudy then added that in Ontario there is an art based high school (I consider that somewhat alternative), where you do your core courses but basically everything else revolves around art, music, theater, etc! What a wonderful place that must be! Then when I came home and talked to Michael about my interview, he told me that there are schools in Ontario that offer pre-nursing, auto mechanics, etc. That sounds too good, eh?
So anyways, our interview continued and I asked Trudy if she ever thought about any other kinds of people that may benefit from an alternative school, and she said that she's so busy focusing on the here and now that she doesn't have much time to think about that stuff. That made me think that perhaps a lot of people are left in the dark because everyone else is too caught up in their own responsibilites.
Trudy believes it is important to work with each individual on their levels; levels of learning, communication, interest. I think this is a valuable quality she carries, as education needs to be regarded on an individual basis. (If there were only more educators like her!)
An issue Trudy and I then talked about was how the Murphy Center deals with people dropping out. She feels we need a better way to deal with this, and we need to present it in such a way that it's not seen as a failure. People need to know it's a normal thing, and although we don't encourage it, we do not frown upon it. A lot of people have felt enough failure in their life to feel it once again if they need to leave the Murphy Center. They should be reassured that it just may not be the right time in their life, and that they can come back when their ready. Addressing retention better is something that she feels we need to work on as a community. I think, perhaps, that it may also prevent people from just drifting away. Some people miss time and then they get discouraged, but if they know they are not going to be looked down on if they want to leave then there will be less pressure and perhaps they may decide to stay!
The last thing Trudy and I discussed was the advisory process. I told her that we talked about the advisory process being more unified, and she agreed. She said that every adviser should still maintain their own personal style, but when it comes to timing, and regularity, that advisers should get together on this. She talked about how one time at the Murphy Center there were scheduled class times for advisory meetings, and she said this was effective and she wishes it was brought back. I'm sure there is a reason Tim decided to stop doing it, but Trudy feels the positives of it outweigh the negative. She also feels that if someone doesn't want to be an adviser, then they shouldn't have to. She doesn't want me to mention this persons name specifically, but she said that there is an adviser that doesn't like to do it, and he/she is uncomfortable with approaching people and doesn't even know who is on his/her advisee list. I think in this case this person shouldn't have to do it because it makes him/her uncomfortable and causes the advisees to be left out or unattended. Trudy says this will make a little more work for everyone else, but it would be worth it for the participants sake. I asked Trudy that if there was to be a staff meeting about a unified advisory process if she'd be interested in helping out with it, and she said yes... And now that I think about it, I'd like to see students and staff decide that happens during the advisory process. !!
So, as you can see Trudy and I had a pretty good discussion, and this is just the beginning of my endeavors with staff! It's very exciting because the staff members have experience which is a valuable resource. I think perhaps we can fill in some more on our wheel!
If everyone is in school tomorrow we can come up with a time for our next meeting! I hope you're having a good vacation Morgan, and I look forward to seeing all of you sometime soon!
Ciao!
Hey Trudy, feel free to add anything you thing of!
Hey All!
The meeting today was canceled due to lack of people available to come. We should talk to everyone and see when the best day would be to reschedule. I think we should also discuss what will happen if people aren't able to attend- I think we should move on and allow people time to catch up whenever they're available.
I did get to meet with Trudy today for my first one-on-one interview with a staff member. I didn't get to tape record it due to the fact that Shoppers had no audio tapes and Coffee Matters refused to let me use my laptop during lunch hours, so I took some good notes.
I wasn't sure whether I'd like to share my interviews as they happen or if I would compile a collection of stories and then post, but I was so damn excited by our conversation that I decided I will post them as they happen. We can always go over it again after and put them all together.
I began by having Trudy read over our list of ideas and the ideas we collected during our participant idea session. Then I got her to read over the facilitator questionnaire. I started by asking her what she thought about the list already compiled. Her first response: funding. For majority of our ideas we need some sort of funding for either materials or to pay staff. So I pointed out question number 3 on the questionnaire, and asked her if she could try to speak as if ANYTHING were possible, despite costs. I wanted to get her ideas out before talking about the complications or challenges. She said she'd like to see a wider variety of courses offered: other courses within the high school program, more electives, and more alternative courses as well. She gave examples like the 3 sciences, art, French, more English, socials... Another change Trudy would like to see is more flexibility with which courses are available as independent courses, and more choice for participants in regards this.
Then we moved on to talk something that Trudy feels very strongly about- attendance. She wishes that "there were 90% of the people there 90% of the time". She says it's her biggest barrier as a teacher, and interferes with her teaching, and others' learning. I asked her if she had any ideas about how to keep people in school, and she did not. This seems to be a very frustrating thing for her (and a lot of other teachers) as it is such a complex issue. Thus, in my opinion, in need of serious consideration.
I then went on to ask her how she felt the Murphy Center offers the traditional curriculum in the most alternative way it can. She mentioned that it offers more flexibility than regular high schools, it has smaller class sizes, people can have more time for tests, and in a lot of courses (except publics) she can deliver the curriculum in a way that is more relevant to any individual (she can do this in her writing class, and Ann in her human dynamics). She says that courses with public exams are constraints because you have to focus only on the material given. She loves the semester system, however it's a disadvantage in the regard that it doesn't allow much time for other things.
The conversation then went on to talk about student voice. Trudy feels as if the Murphy Center should be more student-led, especially with big issues like ones we've faced this year: Drugs and violence. She says right now these things are dealt with by the staff; they develop policies and then deliver these policies to the participants. She would like to see these kinds of issues being dealt with by students, or by a combination of staff and students. She feels as if a problem with this is that a lot of staff members do not feel comfortable allowing students too much voice. I found this very interesting, and we went on to discuss that the fear is there that student's may not see it as an important responsibility and take advantage of their position. Another issue was that there could be too much apathy, and empathy. Apathy in the sense that students may not see the issues being dealt with as serious or significant, and empathy in the sense that they may feel guilty because they may partake in the same activities but just never got caught. Trudy feels that a student council might be a good thing, and she also feels as if it may not work, but it should be attempted. She went on to say that she doesn't feel the traditional high school student council would be appropriate, because it's not a collaborative model, but some kind of student leadership group that sits with staff on a regular basis and goes over what's what. She liked the idea of a J.C!
Then Trudy and I discussed comfort levels at the Murphy Center. "The Murphy Center is the only place I've worked where I feel I can bring my whole self to work." Trudy told me a story about a few times during the first year she was working at the Murphy Center. Tim called her into his office to talk and she was always afraid that he was going to tell her that she was being inappropriate and that she'd have to be less personal and more professional. However, that never happened, and after awhile Trudy realized Tim was never going to lecture her for that. She had been in that situation in past jobs where she felt as if being herself was inappropriate and she had to leave pieces of herself at home, but at the Murphy Center it's not like that. I asked her if she thought this kind of attitude was apparent in students as well, and if she had observed this kind of behavior from students. She explained to me that most people are very comfortable- in the classroom, with their friends. But it's not just a matter of if they're comfortable talking to being outgoing, it was also people comfortable to not say anything at all. She said that there are a lot of people in the Murphy Center with social anxiety (for whatever reason), and it's a good atmosphere for them because they don't have to worry if someone is going to single them out and make them speak. If you want to speak, speak all you want. If you prefer to stay quite, that's good too. I think that's a very special quality about our school- you can be who you are and no one makes you act any different! Trudy is also pleased with the lack of bullying that goes on at the Murphy Center. We talked about how a lot of the participants are where they are today because they were bullied and high school and didn't make it through. Another majority of the participants were the bullies- the "bad" kids that pipped off or did drugs and may have been the bullies. Trudy thinks it's amazing how these two types of people can co-exist at the Murphy Center and (usually) never think anything of it!
I asked Trudy if she wouldn't mind if we moved on to talking about curriculum. Then I threw out the question: Could you see us introducing an entirely new, alternative curriculum here at the Murphy Center alongside the current system, or would you prefer to see it in a different facility altogether? Trudy feels as if it would be difficult to start a completely alternative curriculum at the Murphy Center, but she loves the idea of a new facility for just that! She supported her feelings for that by talking about people with significant learning and cognitive difficulties. Being someone who deals with intake at the Murphy Center, Trudy had a very heartbreaking story about turning someone away from the Murphy Center. A man in his mid-twenties had applied for the fall semester and was in for his interview. He had a severe learning disability, and because the Murphy Center doesn't have the resources, programs or supports for that man, he was turned away. When he asked what to do next, Trudy could only tell him that there was nothing- this was the end of the line. She feels as if people in this sad situation would benefit from a completely alternative leaning facility. The type of program the man needs is offered in a regular high school, but being in his mid-twenties he was too old to go back to one. In an alternative facility he would be able to learn life skills and job readiness, as well as being able to get a high school diploma. Trudy then added that in Ontario there is an art based high school (I consider that somewhat alternative), where you do your core courses but basically everything else revolves around art, music, theater, etc! What a wonderful place that must be! Then when I came home and talked to Michael about my interview, he told me that there are schools in Ontario that offer pre-nursing, auto mechanics, etc. That sounds too good, eh?
So anyways, our interview continued and I asked Trudy if she ever thought about any other kinds of people that may benefit from an alternative school, and she said that she's so busy focusing on the here and now that she doesn't have much time to think about that stuff. That made me think that perhaps a lot of people are left in the dark because everyone else is too caught up in their own responsibilites.
Trudy believes it is important to work with each individual on their levels; levels of learning, communication, interest. I think this is a valuable quality she carries, as education needs to be regarded on an individual basis. (If there were only more educators like her!)
An issue Trudy and I then talked about was how the Murphy Center deals with people dropping out. She feels we need a better way to deal with this, and we need to present it in such a way that it's not seen as a failure. People need to know it's a normal thing, and although we don't encourage it, we do not frown upon it. A lot of people have felt enough failure in their life to feel it once again if they need to leave the Murphy Center. They should be reassured that it just may not be the right time in their life, and that they can come back when their ready. Addressing retention better is something that she feels we need to work on as a community. I think, perhaps, that it may also prevent people from just drifting away. Some people miss time and then they get discouraged, but if they know they are not going to be looked down on if they want to leave then there will be less pressure and perhaps they may decide to stay!
The last thing Trudy and I discussed was the advisory process. I told her that we talked about the advisory process being more unified, and she agreed. She said that every adviser should still maintain their own personal style, but when it comes to timing, and regularity, that advisers should get together on this. She talked about how one time at the Murphy Center there were scheduled class times for advisory meetings, and she said this was effective and she wishes it was brought back. I'm sure there is a reason Tim decided to stop doing it, but Trudy feels the positives of it outweigh the negative. She also feels that if someone doesn't want to be an adviser, then they shouldn't have to. She doesn't want me to mention this persons name specifically, but she said that there is an adviser that doesn't like to do it, and he/she is uncomfortable with approaching people and doesn't even know who is on his/her advisee list. I think in this case this person shouldn't have to do it because it makes him/her uncomfortable and causes the advisees to be left out or unattended. Trudy says this will make a little more work for everyone else, but it would be worth it for the participants sake. I asked Trudy that if there was to be a staff meeting about a unified advisory process if she'd be interested in helping out with it, and she said yes... And now that I think about it, I'd like to see students and staff decide that happens during the advisory process. !!
So, as you can see Trudy and I had a pretty good discussion, and this is just the beginning of my endeavors with staff! It's very exciting because the staff members have experience which is a valuable resource. I think perhaps we can fill in some more on our wheel!
If everyone is in school tomorrow we can come up with a time for our next meeting! I hope you're having a good vacation Morgan, and I look forward to seeing all of you sometime soon!
Ciao!
19.4.08
Brainstorming an Idea I Had
-Putting your problems into perspective, with the hopes of stepping back and taking a look, and learning to deal with problems in life without forgetting the positives.
-A scale (or multiple scales) which rate an individuals griefs on a scale.
-The scale is a personal scale. The high is what irritates you the most, what causes you the most grief, or what effects you the most negatively. Use examples to get juices flowing. (serious health problems, death, failure, poverty).
-The low is what irritates you, but only mildly. (Examples: spilling something, stubbing your toe, waiting in line).
-In between there is vast room for other things to be positioned. (Examples: getting a bad grade, breaking up with someone, needing surgery, etc, depending on how sensative (maybe find a better word than sensative) a person is to a particular subject. )
-Everyone's scale is different. What may be painful for some may not be for others. Certain things may affect certain people based on their past experiences.
-Purpose: to assess what irritates you or causes you grief in order to decide how you deal with it.
-Why? Because shit always happens in life and there's nothing going to change that (maybe a bit better worded..) It's all about how you DEAL with things which determines your level of contentedness.
-For the first time, and perhaps every so often as you change and grow, create a scale of all the great things in your life, rated from the one you value and enjoy the most to something that makes you smile. Then, you can use this to remind yourself that, despite things that may happen to cause you grief, there are still good things in your life that you need to focus on. (i believe focusing on the positive things will make a more positive outlook and attitude).
-Ethics: People need to understand that every scale is different for every individual, and that their feelings won't be compared to anyone else's.
-An everyday thing that people can do to deal with stress. (not a survey or interview)
-Everyday stress can also include things you are worried about in the present day that are actually occurring in the future.
-Scenario: I am really upset because I have encountered a somewhat expensive debt that I am not responsible for. I start to feel anxious and upset. I may blame myself or seek to blame others, and become overwhelmed and stressed out. If I have learned to assess my problem (based on my scale of things relevant to my life) than it may look like this:
I got an 83% on an English test (lowest mark yet). -1
I had a minor argument with my partner that was solved shortly after. -2
I didn't get the shifts I needed at work this week. -3
I got a sinus infection. -4
I have a $500 debt that I can pay in monthly installments of $40.-5
I have to take out a student loan soon. -6
I have to find an affordable apartment near MUN. -7
I think my partner may be moving away. -8
So, I've rated the things that are bothering me .There's no need to list all these every time.. These are just used as reference to show that what happened at this given time that's stressing me out (the unexpected debt) in the big scheme of things isn't my BIGGEST concern. It's not my smallest either, so how do I want to deal with it?
-Steps (to be altered with further discovery)...
-These steps might be different depending on the situation. Obviously you'd have to follow different steps when dealing with the lost of a loved one than you would if you had financial difficulties... but in general:
1. Search for available solutions.
2. Make a plan. Write it down.
3. Talk to your friends. Get it off your chest.
4. Take the proper actions to follow through with the suitable plan.
-Maybe research different professional self-help methods given by experts for individual stresses or situations... death, drinking, pregnancy, smoking, addiction, finances, business planning, etc etc..
-Provide resources to get access to these things ^^
-Changing perspectives. Putting into perspective how bad it really is. sometimes it's easy to avoid the grief by simply accepting that bad things happen and taking it all in stride.. (giving attention to serious situations when necessary)
-Think of the positive things to come out of it. "You Live You Learn"
-Failure is only failure when you fail to learn from it.
to be continued....
-A scale (or multiple scales) which rate an individuals griefs on a scale.
-The scale is a personal scale. The high is what irritates you the most, what causes you the most grief, or what effects you the most negatively. Use examples to get juices flowing. (serious health problems, death, failure, poverty).
-The low is what irritates you, but only mildly. (Examples: spilling something, stubbing your toe, waiting in line).
-In between there is vast room for other things to be positioned. (Examples: getting a bad grade, breaking up with someone, needing surgery, etc, depending on how sensative (maybe find a better word than sensative) a person is to a particular subject. )
-Everyone's scale is different. What may be painful for some may not be for others. Certain things may affect certain people based on their past experiences.
-Purpose: to assess what irritates you or causes you grief in order to decide how you deal with it.
-Why? Because shit always happens in life and there's nothing going to change that (maybe a bit better worded..) It's all about how you DEAL with things which determines your level of contentedness.
-For the first time, and perhaps every so often as you change and grow, create a scale of all the great things in your life, rated from the one you value and enjoy the most to something that makes you smile. Then, you can use this to remind yourself that, despite things that may happen to cause you grief, there are still good things in your life that you need to focus on. (i believe focusing on the positive things will make a more positive outlook and attitude).
-Ethics: People need to understand that every scale is different for every individual, and that their feelings won't be compared to anyone else's.
-An everyday thing that people can do to deal with stress. (not a survey or interview)
-Everyday stress can also include things you are worried about in the present day that are actually occurring in the future.
-Scenario: I am really upset because I have encountered a somewhat expensive debt that I am not responsible for. I start to feel anxious and upset. I may blame myself or seek to blame others, and become overwhelmed and stressed out. If I have learned to assess my problem (based on my scale of things relevant to my life) than it may look like this:
I got an 83% on an English test (lowest mark yet). -1
I had a minor argument with my partner that was solved shortly after. -2
I didn't get the shifts I needed at work this week. -3
I got a sinus infection. -4
I have a $500 debt that I can pay in monthly installments of $40.-5
I have to take out a student loan soon. -6
I have to find an affordable apartment near MUN. -7
I think my partner may be moving away. -8
So, I've rated the things that are bothering me .There's no need to list all these every time.. These are just used as reference to show that what happened at this given time that's stressing me out (the unexpected debt) in the big scheme of things isn't my BIGGEST concern. It's not my smallest either, so how do I want to deal with it?
-Steps (to be altered with further discovery)...
-These steps might be different depending on the situation. Obviously you'd have to follow different steps when dealing with the lost of a loved one than you would if you had financial difficulties... but in general:
1. Search for available solutions.
2. Make a plan. Write it down.
3. Talk to your friends. Get it off your chest.
4. Take the proper actions to follow through with the suitable plan.
-Maybe research different professional self-help methods given by experts for individual stresses or situations... death, drinking, pregnancy, smoking, addiction, finances, business planning, etc etc..
-Provide resources to get access to these things ^^
-Changing perspectives. Putting into perspective how bad it really is. sometimes it's easy to avoid the grief by simply accepting that bad things happen and taking it all in stride.. (giving attention to serious situations when necessary)
-Think of the positive things to come out of it. "You Live You Learn"
-Failure is only failure when you fail to learn from it.
to be continued....
18.4.08
sicky poo
I am sooooo sick today. So so so so so sick. It started at the tip of my nose, worked it's way down my face, into my neck and then down my throat. I tried scraping therapy yesterday but I don't think I was doing it right.. I still feel like shit. I missed garbage day, I missed school, and I gotta call in sick for work. It's not a good time to be sick, let me tell you, I am way too busy to get sick. *le sigh*.
I was considering planning a youth peer-to-peer group session for victims of sexual abuse. It's become a pretty big issue in this city right now and a lot of the time people can't take legal action. I want to start a group for youth to come and simply talk- I could offer a shoulder, an ear, and some advice.. Perhaps I could find a professional in this area to attend as well to offer any expert advice. That's something I'm thinking about now..
New tattoos soon! I'm getting the Murphy Center logo on my wrist, and my brothers names in graffiti on the back of my elbows! Soo excited.
More later......too sick...
I was considering planning a youth peer-to-peer group session for victims of sexual abuse. It's become a pretty big issue in this city right now and a lot of the time people can't take legal action. I want to start a group for youth to come and simply talk- I could offer a shoulder, an ear, and some advice.. Perhaps I could find a professional in this area to attend as well to offer any expert advice. That's something I'm thinking about now..
New tattoos soon! I'm getting the Murphy Center logo on my wrist, and my brothers names in graffiti on the back of my elbows! Soo excited.
More later......too sick...
14.4.08
Ups and Downs
It's funny how sometimes things can be sooo great, and sometimes soooo terrible. Being inflicted with anger or despair is (personally) easier than feeling overwhelmingly happy about one thing and then extremely upset about another. The collision of emotions is almost unbearable. I sometimes feel as if school is my escape. Maybe that's why I cling on to it. Well, at least I have a lot of schooling ahead of me. It should get me through the intensely difficulties that lie ahead.
Don't worry. I'm not terminally ill, thank God. I am grateful for my health and the health of my friends and family. I am grateful we are not all starving or dying from disease. I appreciate the wonderful things I have all around me- the wonderful people.... However.. I hate money. I hate it so much that whenever I have it I just want to (quite literally) give it away. I want to spend it or put it on bills or give it to charity. ANYTHING so it does not burn a hole in my pocket. Come to think of it, there is probably some "dis-order" that says I have a phobia of money- I wouldn't deny it. I love spending money, I HATE having it. It makes me feel anxious and restless. It consumes my thoughts. So... Being a person that detests money more than the average student, BANG I am hit with a threat from a collections agency for $808.00. Wow. $808.00 from Nubody's. My membership was only $560.00 for an entire year for myself and Mike. We had paid up to the fifth month. Then, my hours got cut to virtually nil, Mike lost his job and was getting minimal hours from his Dad, and we were in a hard spot. We kept paying it for about a month after that, struggling to make sure the money was in the bank account (on several occasions, we couldn't get the money in time and ended up with a $40.00 fee from the bank plus an addition $20.00 for a late charge on the Nubody's account). Then one day Mike and I decided we'd go into Nubody's and try to discuss it with the person there in charge. We went in and talked to a man for about half hour. Before we went in I had no expectations of walking out of there feeling accomplished, but while we were in there the man gave us the impression that he was going to take care of it. He told us that if we have no money then really there is nothing else we can do... I explained our hard circumstances and he seemed sympathetic and understanding. He told me someone would give me a call in a week to let me know if there were any concerns, and I left it at that. I was under the impression he was taking care of it, and perhaps I'd get the last bill from the late charges I already owed and then it would be done. A week went by and no one called and the incident slipped completely from my mind. I guess I was waiting for a call to tell me if something was wrong, and it never came, so I was never concerned. Then a bit more than a month later I got an email from Nubody's, stating that I owed them $315.00, and if I didn't pay my membership would be canceled. Confused, I emailed back and told them I had been talking to a man at Nubody's and that he had assured me that I would be taken care of. I felt confident when I left which was unexpected to me but welcomed. The woman emailed me back telling me that just because I went and spoke to him doesn't mean it was canceled. I can understand this- it may not be easy to cancel a year-long contract- but I had been under the impression that I was to be called within a week if there were any concerns, and there was no call so I didn't worry. If I had've been aware that there was a growing debt, I would've been paying it (I've been working again recently). I feel as if I was deceived, and now I'm paying for it big time. I got a letter in the mail saying I now owe them $808.00. I can't understand why it's so high, because the membership wasn't even that expensive to begin with. I called the collections agency, and they said that it is going to the credit bureau tomorrow at 11:00am unless I pay it in full before then. So, I guess I'm going to have this scratch on my credit for the next 6 years (apparently). My dad told me not to worry.. That they'll just bug me a lot but they wouldn't take me to small claims court, so if he's wrong at least he can back me up. hhaa.. *nervous sigh*
I don't know what to do now. Already 90% of my checks is accounted for, with bills, rent, transportation, etc. I am paying off a VISA that I used when I was unemployed and really sick. It just seems like I am continually getting financially fucked over. There's no use in explaining all of the incidents on here, I just needed to vent about this one, but if ya only knew how much of this shit I've gone through. Especially with other people's errors or in some cases flat out intentional fuck-overs, I've been screwed out of thousands of dollars.
So. MUN in September. It's looking grim. I would feel more comfortable if I could take a semester off to save some money- I wouldn't have to get a student loan. However, I do not want to take time off school. I want to be there- it makes me happy. So what do I do? I don't want to always be stressed about money. There is MORE TO LIFE.
*****
I'm going to be Zen now. Take the good with the bad. Accept it as a part of life and a learning experience. Shove it up Nubody's fucking asses, and get over it. BUild a bridge.
*sigh*
Don't worry. I'm not terminally ill, thank God. I am grateful for my health and the health of my friends and family. I am grateful we are not all starving or dying from disease. I appreciate the wonderful things I have all around me- the wonderful people.... However.. I hate money. I hate it so much that whenever I have it I just want to (quite literally) give it away. I want to spend it or put it on bills or give it to charity. ANYTHING so it does not burn a hole in my pocket. Come to think of it, there is probably some "dis-order" that says I have a phobia of money- I wouldn't deny it. I love spending money, I HATE having it. It makes me feel anxious and restless. It consumes my thoughts. So... Being a person that detests money more than the average student, BANG I am hit with a threat from a collections agency for $808.00. Wow. $808.00 from Nubody's. My membership was only $560.00 for an entire year for myself and Mike. We had paid up to the fifth month. Then, my hours got cut to virtually nil, Mike lost his job and was getting minimal hours from his Dad, and we were in a hard spot. We kept paying it for about a month after that, struggling to make sure the money was in the bank account (on several occasions, we couldn't get the money in time and ended up with a $40.00 fee from the bank plus an addition $20.00 for a late charge on the Nubody's account). Then one day Mike and I decided we'd go into Nubody's and try to discuss it with the person there in charge. We went in and talked to a man for about half hour. Before we went in I had no expectations of walking out of there feeling accomplished, but while we were in there the man gave us the impression that he was going to take care of it. He told us that if we have no money then really there is nothing else we can do... I explained our hard circumstances and he seemed sympathetic and understanding. He told me someone would give me a call in a week to let me know if there were any concerns, and I left it at that. I was under the impression he was taking care of it, and perhaps I'd get the last bill from the late charges I already owed and then it would be done. A week went by and no one called and the incident slipped completely from my mind. I guess I was waiting for a call to tell me if something was wrong, and it never came, so I was never concerned. Then a bit more than a month later I got an email from Nubody's, stating that I owed them $315.00, and if I didn't pay my membership would be canceled. Confused, I emailed back and told them I had been talking to a man at Nubody's and that he had assured me that I would be taken care of. I felt confident when I left which was unexpected to me but welcomed. The woman emailed me back telling me that just because I went and spoke to him doesn't mean it was canceled. I can understand this- it may not be easy to cancel a year-long contract- but I had been under the impression that I was to be called within a week if there were any concerns, and there was no call so I didn't worry. If I had've been aware that there was a growing debt, I would've been paying it (I've been working again recently). I feel as if I was deceived, and now I'm paying for it big time. I got a letter in the mail saying I now owe them $808.00. I can't understand why it's so high, because the membership wasn't even that expensive to begin with. I called the collections agency, and they said that it is going to the credit bureau tomorrow at 11:00am unless I pay it in full before then. So, I guess I'm going to have this scratch on my credit for the next 6 years (apparently). My dad told me not to worry.. That they'll just bug me a lot but they wouldn't take me to small claims court, so if he's wrong at least he can back me up. hhaa.. *nervous sigh*
I don't know what to do now. Already 90% of my checks is accounted for, with bills, rent, transportation, etc. I am paying off a VISA that I used when I was unemployed and really sick. It just seems like I am continually getting financially fucked over. There's no use in explaining all of the incidents on here, I just needed to vent about this one, but if ya only knew how much of this shit I've gone through. Especially with other people's errors or in some cases flat out intentional fuck-overs, I've been screwed out of thousands of dollars.
So. MUN in September. It's looking grim. I would feel more comfortable if I could take a semester off to save some money- I wouldn't have to get a student loan. However, I do not want to take time off school. I want to be there- it makes me happy. So what do I do? I don't want to always be stressed about money. There is MORE TO LIFE.
*****
I'm going to be Zen now. Take the good with the bad. Accept it as a part of life and a learning experience. Shove it up Nubody's fucking asses, and get over it. BUild a bridge.
*sigh*
10.4.08
A nice day for a new blog.
Yay me! I'm starting my own personal blog which I am going to use for.. well.. pretty much all my ideas. (well, ideas that i want to share with the world, anyways). Take it for what you want it. Criticize it, steal it, love it or hate it. Just remember that knowledge is knowing all the answers to life's questions but wisdom is knowing when to let others learn for themselves.
I'm really excited about my new role at school. I feel like I am really making a difference, and I feel as if I'm practicing for my future as a mad scientist. I find it very astonishing that one day I had an idea, an urge, and not even a week later the opportunity of a life-time falls into my lap. At the time I didn't realize how grand the opportunity would evolve, but now I'm feeling as if I'm really... that this is really the beginning of the beginning of a whole new sector of my life. I am cherishing and loving the opportunities that have been so generously set in front of me. I will not fuck this up, and that's a great new feeling to me. I have quite a past, and because this is a new diary you may never see it. However, I am glad to leave my past behind and move on as the character it created.
This is a tribute to myself. I am understanding, kind, generous, hard working, loyal, and fucking determined to be successful in this awesome opportunity.
So, indulge if you may. I do like comments and notes and stuff.
And hahahaha please note the constant changes in mood and personality. Hahahahahahaah.
Braw.
"I speak outside what is recognized as the border between "reason" and "insanity". But I consider it a measure of my humanity to be written off by the living graves of a billion murdered lives. And I'm not ashamed of my recurring dreams about me and a gun and a different species (hint: starts with "h" and rhymes with "Neuman's") of carnage strewn about the stockyards, the factories and farms. Still I know as well as anyone that it does less good than harm to be this honest with a conscience eased by lies. But you cannot deny that meat is still murder. Dairy is still rape. And I'm still as stupid as anyone, but I know my mistakes. I have recognized one form of oppression, now I recognize the rest. And life's too short to make another's shorter- (animal liberation now!)."
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